Guest blog by Cynthia Knorr-Mulder RNC, MSN, NP-C,CS, C.Ht
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog
Sometimes I wonder how the most annoying people so easily learn how to cultivate the art to charm. One of my more frequent patients who my colleagues describe as annoying, can at times appear to be so charming that as a practitioner you feel completely convinced that this is the session that is going to stop the negative patterns of behavior, change his life completely around and turn prince annoying into a real charmer. Unfortunately, three visits later, you find out you were wrong.
I started seeing prince annoying over two years ago for many reasons, but more simply put - because everything in his life always went wrong. At the age of thirty something, he was the author of every blind date horror story some sick Steven King wannabe could conjure up. Not only was he longing to find his princess, he hoped his family jewels would soon produce some heirs.
He was not your typical prince, as princes would go. He was short, not tall, he was not handsome well okay, but he was dark. As a practitioner I am always able to look closely into someone's eyes and see their true soul revealing their inner beauty. Because that is where true inner beauty lies.
Okay by this point you are now wondering why he was crowned the name annoying. I guess you could say it is because he always shows up. With an appointment he shows up, without an appointment he shows up, just because he was driving by, he shows up. For whatever reason he seems to always be there discussing how horrible life is and asking why his princess hasn't shown up.
My secretary learned quickly how to pull up the moat bridge, and put on her armor. "I'm sorry she is with another patient would you like to make an appointment perhaps for next year, I mean next week". Quickly the young prince caught on and when finally one day I answered the phone directly he said, " Oh good, I thought you were avoiding me." I quickly felt pity, until I remembered that such an emotion is negative and invites nothing but bad experiences, so I changed pity to guilt and scheduled him in for next year, I mean next week.
I dreaded telling my colleagues that he was due for a visit, but sooner or later they found out and as the time approached they scurried into their offices, armor on, doors closed to avoid the soon to be crowned King of annoying. As he sat comfortably in my office chair, looking like he was prepared to stay for a 20-hour session I began to wonder what made us all feel that he was so annoying.
So how are you? "I'm fine prince annoying. How are you?" I answered. Well you know, so how are you doing? "I'm doing good prince annoying how are you?" I continued. Well I'm not sure. So how are things going..? Stop the press, what was I thinking; now I know why he's so annoying.
"Let's get right to the point, how is your life going?" I questioned. Not well, I had a terrible accident I fell into a tree while walking down the street. Well that explained the two black eyes and abrasions that I was trying so hard not to stare at. Yeah and that was 8 weeks ago and I still look like this. "Why did it happen?" I don't know he said. I tripped. Trying to move the conversation along as not to go back to how I was doing, I continued to ask if the princess had yet been found, after all he had been carrying her shoe around for over 19 years.
Well maybe this time, he replied. I have been dating a girl for the past 5 months, she likes me a lot, we have a lot in common and we are having a lot of fun. But, I said. You knew there was a but coming. If this prince hadn't been titled annoying, he could of been the prince of but. Well but, I' don't know. Yes you do, I thought. Just get to the point and stop being so annoying.
Well but what? Well there is one thing about her? She broke her leg as a child and now she walks funny, you really can't notice, but I think do I want to marry someone who is not perfect? Before booting him completely out of my office and claiming the title as International President, having been voted in by every single woman in this world, I decided I would give him one last chance before I ditched him into the alligator pit.
Have you gotten to know her soul? Does her outer beauty reflect her inner beauty? Has she gotten to know your soul? And what about your inner beauty? I fired so many inner soul related questions so quickly, I was sure that not only had I lost him, but I think he was hoping for an out of body experience just to avoid my questions. I waited for his reply but there was none.
And suddenly I realized that if I were starting all over again as a princess bride, I would find the ugliest prince in the world for I was sure he would understand life so deeply in a spiritual sense that he would have to have a beautiful soul, a true inner beauty. And he would truly understand that it is not looking beautiful where true inner beauty lies. If I could find this ugly prince, I would snatch him up so quickly, kiss him on his green froggy lips and know that he would love me for who I truly was.
Hey doesn't this sound like the frog and the princess story. Of course it does and do you know why? Because it was a princess that recognized the true inner beauty of the frog and in doing so she found her prince. Do you think they would write a story about a prince that kissed a frog because he recognized the frogs true inner beauty and behold he got a princess? Get real. Obviously in all of history nothings changed. It is still the princess that sees beyond the frog.
I ended the session with prince annoying by asking him to reflect upon what purpose his tree mishap may have had in his life. I also told him that it was important to learn a lesson when approached by a wise old teacher - the tree. In fact some ancient old trees have been known to teach many a wise scholar but seldom a slimy frog. I continued to stress to him that he would be wise to learn the lesson for if the lesson was not learnt the first time the teacher would be back again, only next time with a bigger lesson.
How many times does it take a big fat tree trunk to hit a guy in the face in an effort to realize that any woman who loves him must be the most beautiful princess in the land?
As for me I will not have to worry my teachers will be very proud, for I learned this lesson quickly. Prince annoying's are just that - annoying. No charm can change my availability to provide healing to a soul that chooses to seek a magic wall that will manifest a beautiful princess so that he can live happily ever after. To find a fairy tale ending we must seek our own inner love, appreciate the beauty of the soul, and respect the true magic of life.
As for Prince Annoying, until he realizes he is traveling on a sacred journey, I predict there will be many a tree that jumps into his path hoping he will look into the mirror and see beyond the trauma on his face. Until one day he realizes that by looking inward to find self-love and reclaim his own inner beauty he will indeed find his princess has inner beauty. The same inner beauty that I saw in his soul each visit, something that has been there all along, just like the beautiful princess that he could find if only he would step back from the wall to see her.
And what about me, well I'm living happily ever after because I did kiss a frog, once upon a time, a long time ago. Of course I found that frog only after learning that you couldn't kiss an alligator without getting bit. As for my frog, well he turned into a prince and is now tall dark and handsome. He too has carried around my shoe for the past 19 years, however he knows so well how to look past the material me to where my true inner beauty lies - within my soul.