Seven Types of Men to Avoid if You Are Looking for a Mate

Guest blog by June Marshall
Author of The Dirty Seven: Ladies Beware!
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog

Where Have All the Good Men Gone?

If you are an intelligent, independent woman looking for a relationship with a man, it takes patience to find someone you can respect, whose heart is open to you, and you can be with without driving you up the wall.

Good mate-material is out there. But, while you are looking, don't waste your time and money on The Dirty Seven.

Underlying Problem: The underlying problem with The Dirty Seven is a kind of selfishness that makes them incapable of giving your needs fair play. They lack empathy (the ability to put themselves in your shoes).

Who are these Guys?

Don't give up your freedom and happiness for these guys. They will always put you and your needs second or last. Read on to see who they are and what you can do about them.

1. ScarMan: Talks continuously about his ex and the past, to the exclusion of everything else, including you. You feel like saying, "Hello! You are out with me!"

If you want to feel first in a man's heart, throw ScarMan back on the dating beach.

2. SideMan: Married or living with someone but looking for some excitement on the side, with no intention of creating a real relationship. 

Walk away and don't look back. He wants to use you. If it takes a lie, he will lie to get what he wants, without a thought for the pain he causes.

3. CrazyMan: Has so many quirks, a hospital wing of psychotherapists couldn't figure him out. He'll drive you nuts if you give him a long-term try.

4. GuyMan: Likes guys better than girls but pretends to be straight. The fact that he is lying to you about it is what makes him one of The Dirty Seven.

Let him go on his journey of discovering his true identity without you.

5. YAPpie: (Young And Poor) have the benefit of youth on their side but not much else: No money and no job prospects. You pay for everything and drive him around too.

Do less for him. He is a species of parasite that survives by living off of women and will move on.

6. OLMan: (Old Loser Man) is the YAPpie, grown older but not wiser. He has not provided for his future. He is looking to you to do that for him. He was lazy, selfish, and clueless in his youth and has remained the same in his old age.

Do not get involved with him until you find out where and how he lives. Go there with him. If he is penniless, especially beware of how he lives.

7. BagMan: Difficult children from different marriages some of whom live with him, multiple alimony payments, and lots of bitterness over past woes are just some of the baggage this man brings to the relationship. 

Give up on him before you are left holding the bag.

Good Guys

Good guys are out there and are worth taking the time to find. The good mate thinks about the "us" before he thinks about himself. The relationship is foremost in his life and he shows you that it is. His life is not about his miserable self, self, self and he wants to do something to make things better in the world instead of being a drain on the system.

He takes care of himself because he has self-respect. Money is not what motivates him. His heart guides him. He lives his life with passion and is not a wound-licking victim or an ego-driven control freak. He understands the territory of love and shares it with you. He appreciates and respects you and you feel a warm glow of happiness when you think of him. He is the exact opposite of all of the Dirty Seven:

· The un-ScarMan: He is not stuck in the past and is here with you, now. He wants to learn about you because he is interested.
· The un-SideMan: He is devoted to you and not lots of chicks on the side. He puts his whole heart into your relationship.
· The un-CrazyMan: He has enough reference in reality to be able to share your world with enthusiasm. He is balanced and rational.
· The un-GuyMan: He is honest about his sexuality and loves you because you are a woman with a woman's body.
· The un-YAPpie: He can support himself and does not expect you to be a Sugar Mama. He has plans and goals for what he wants from life and how he wants to contribute to others.
· The un-OLMan: He has had a life vision and continues to work on it, even when he is up in years. He can support himself and stays young-at-heart, though he has the wisdom that comes with age and experience.
· The un-BagMan: He might have some baggage, as everyone who has lived has, but he does not inflict it on you so that it takes over your life. He has handled it cleanly and fairly so that it does not keep coming back to haunt him and you.

How To Age Well

Guest blog by Shirley Madhère, M.D.
Watch the interview

Aging is a natural phenomenon; we will all experience it. How we age is a matter of a number of variables, including genetics, lifestyle, health, stress, the environment, and choice. One such choice that is popular in age management is within the realm of plastic surgery. For those who choose to undergo some “intervention,” it may be in the form of minor, in-office procedures as injectables (Botox, fillers, etc.) and skin rejuvenation (laser, chemical peel, Vitaglow, etc.), or a “nip/tuck” (operative plastic surgery). Nevertheless, regardless of how one chooses to manage and show one’s age, whether or not with the help of a surgeon’s needle or knife, it is beneficial to age well and to look good for one’s given age, i.e., to be a better version of one’s current self. Before one can undertake an age management program, it is important to empower oneself by understanding how we age and what can be done to influence the process.

There are a number of factors that contribute to aging. These may be generally classified as intrinsic and extrinsic. Intrinsic factors are those with which we were born and thus cannot be controlled. Extrinsic factors are typically learned or acquired and therefore can be altered. Factors that lend to aging which may not be adjusted include genetics, skin type, and pore size, while those that may be changed for improved health include lifestyle, nutrition, and stress. Of note, appearance and how one feels about different variables of his/her life are now believed to play an increased role in wellness. In fact, the World Health Organization modified the definition of health as “… a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.” Moreover, wellness has been defined by the National Wellness Association as "an active process of becoming aware of and making choices toward a more successful existence." Therefore, aging well is an individualized and holistic process that encompasses internal and external aspects of health and living.

The outward manifestations of aging occur on the level of the skin and begin by age 30. As we age, the facial skin becomes dry, less elastic, less firm (from the loss of collagen), and may show signs of sun damage. It may also be uneven, discolored, sagging, and develop wrinkles and loss of volume or facial fat. These manifestations are the result of a combination of natural aging (intrinsic) as well as extrinsic aging. Although each individual is genetically programmed differently and the rate of aging will vary from one person to the next, these changes will nonetheless occur to some extent at some point. For example, the 40 year old woman will have hopefully built a healthy skin foundation that she began in her 20’s, adjusted for her 30’s and now, in her 40’s, will modify to suit the particular changes her skin has undergone, namely dryness, loss of firmness and elasticity, and possible sun damage. Typically, more definitive steps should be taken to address these issues. While a healthy skin regimen should be a part of every woman’s (and man’s) routine, it may be appropriate also for women in their 40’s to consider office-based rejuvenation procedures as Botox (to soften hard facial lines), fillers (to add lost volume), chemical peels (to even out skin tone), Vitaglow (to help increase facial blood flow and help stimulate collagen), and plastic surgery to help manage excess, sagging skin that may not respond to other therapeutic modalities. The decision to undergo any of these procedures is highly personal, where one considers one’s beauty philosophy, budget, time, and expectations, and should discuss with her plastic surgeon. 

Taking a holistic approach to beauty and wellness is how I advise my patients to look as great as they feel. I believe that beauty emanates from within and that healing occurs from the inside out. Therefore, to age well, I “prescribe” the following 10 tips to looking fabulous at every age:

1. Establish a good foundation: take care of your skin. Moisturize it, protect it from the sun, and stop touching it throughout the day! Whether with injectables or actual surgery, healthy, well-moisturized skin responds better to the needle and the knife;
2. Practice a holistic approach to beauty. The healthier you are overall, the better your skin and tissues will respond to a surgeon’s “interventions” or any other treatments. Also, know who you are and know who you are not: understand what effects look good on you; know your own face. What fits your best friend’s cheeks may not be suitable for yours;
3. Keep your mind active and your brain performing; engage in lifelong learning;
4. Stop smoking. Period. If you need help, get it;
5. Avoid prolonged, unprotected sun exposure. Enough said; you have heard it all before;
6. Be emotional: maintain an optimistic attitude and try to live an emotionally enriched life every day. Also, nourish your spirituality and have faith. Explore your metaphysical core. Be present. Practice detachment. Look for deeper meaning;
7. Honor your temple with good nutrition. A proper eating regimen will help to ensure normal healing, maintain active metabolism, and encourage efficient elimination of toxins. If healthful eating is lacking, take vitamins and supplements as directed by your physician or nutritionist as a complement to eating well. Limit intake of sugar, fat, and alcohol and stay hydrated to help your body clear itself of toxins. This is particularly helpful after surgery when your body enters into a state of relative dehydration and is briefly deprived of nutritional support;
8. Remain social: studies have shown that a strong social network may improve health and that close friendships may increase natural immunity;
9. Exercise regularly. There is really no way around it;
10. Manage stress effectively and often. Get consistent and adequate sleep every night. Listen to your body.

Aging well is as dynamic as the aging process itself. To look and feel well involves a balanced lifestyle that incorporates a variety of factors to help achieve successful living. With or without the knife, it cannot be argued that beauty is health and healthy is beautiful!
. Shirley Madhère is a plastic surgeon who practices “holistic plastic surgery” in New York City. 

Healing Pain Healing Lives

Guest blog by Cynthia Knorr-Mulder MSN, NP-C, CHt
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog

Many of us first experienced pain as a child. A fall off a bike, a bee sting or a scrapped knee from the pavement can cause even the bravest child to run home crying to their parents, seeking comfort and healing. A hug, a band-aid and some soft music can stop bleeding in a second and comfort even the biggest bruise in a matter of minutes. 

Healing pain is as simple as it was when I was 5 years old, but along the way as I have studied medicine, I have found that many of us as healthcare professionals have forgotten what heals us best - our relationships, how we live our lives and our feelings of wholeness and belonging. For all the technological advances in pain management, modern medicine still has much to learn about healing pain. Healing is not only a one to one relationship it is a multidimensional aspect of energy. 

Pain is a symptom of imbalance. A true healer of pain recognizes that pain is not only a symptom of disharmony of the body, but a disharmony of the patients' life. Heal the patients' pain - heal the patients' life. Patients' with pain are connected to other people, to families, communities, work, their home, and yes even to the their surrounding environment. All of these relationships need to be in balance in order to heal the patients' pain and heal their lives. In fact all of the patients relationships need to be in harmony and balance in order to maintain health. 

To start the healing process the patient with pain seeking medical care must find a therapeutic relationship with their healer. This is the most important aspect of achieving healing. Many of my patients are referred to me as the last resort. They have tried everything and nothing has helped their pain. They present in my office with no hope, no emotional strength, no support, no relationships and sometimes a belief that pain will always be a part of their life. But they all present with one thing in common - pain and the intent and desire to get rid of it. I can give them all the medicine in the world, but there is little that I can do to heal them and take their pain away unless they seek healing. It takes more than just medicine to heal the pain these patients experience. It takes intent on the patients' part and a therapeutic, caring and humanistic relationship on my part.

I find myself in a constant struggle between two worlds, the scientific one where I truly believe that nothing works unless data has been researched. Then there is the intuitive side of me - a patient walks in my office and I begin to know their whole life story, why they experience pain and what it will take to change their course towards healing. To care for a patient experiencing pain is an opportunity to enter sacred space, a place where the mind-body-spirit connects to a dimension of healing far beyond this universe. 
In order to heal your pain, you need to find a therapeutic relationship with a practice that can nurture and support you. Your relationship with your physician and nurse practitioner should in a sense be a form of preventative medicine. You should feel as if you are in a sacred space where healing occurs. The healer that works with you should look searchingly into your eyes and communicate a sense of caring and trust.

Having experienced my own pain was by far the best and most important part of my training in pain management because I learned what it was like to be on the other side of my profession, as a patient with pain. I got to see through a patients eyes what is like to be a patient in pain. I will never forget this lesson and will never see pain management in the same way again. 

To care for my patients I view their pain as more than just a symptom. In order to do this, I have to remember that each patient has a story, each one a reason why they experience pain. I believe that in order to understand pain, you must understand the reason behind the pain, the life force, energy, chi, the thing that connects all things and is within all things, and the consciousness of which we are all a part. 

The art of healing is a magnificent experience. In spite of my University education that has taught me to accept the significance of researched theory, I believe that energy healing techniques can dramatically change ones experience of pain. The spiritual intensity and energy that surrounds a patient during a integrative modality session can help the patient return to a way of balance and guides the patient's body back to a pain free state.

As I see how my patients respond to my caring and humanistic philosophy it makes me appreciate the therapeutic relationship and thereby become a better healer myself. Each day I am constantly reminded that the way my patients heal and decrease their perception of pain has as much to do with the patient as it does my skills as a practitioner. 

Imagine using the best of modern medicine, the best interventional procedures and the best therapeutic relationships in a multidimensional approach that recognizes the patient as a whole, more than the sum of their body-mind and spirit. At any given moment we all have the ability to heal or be healed. Meshing together both worlds while practicing this philosophy is a very strong pain management medicine. This is what I do each day. This is what I call Integrative Medicine. 

Join The Real Fight Against Obesity: Go BioChemical™! and beat the Yo-Yo Effect

Guest blog by Eleonora DeLennart
Author of The BioChemical Machine 2
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog

Many responsible people realized that we reached a point in history where health and weight problems can no longer be politicized when Professor Krugman's gave the New York Times his landmark statement "…it's in health care, not Social Security." And CNN (December 31, 2005) reported: "Annual cost of obesity is $117 billion." 

But isn't it true that people dieted like crazy in order to get healthy and slim over the past 50 years? Yet, it is dieting that is the root of all evil. Diets make people fat! People "lose" muscle mass and water-and health, but not the fat they want to lose. That's why diets have failed for the half century. And as soon as dieters stop dieting they gain everything back and usually more-which is the case in 99% of all dieters. The reason? The starvation shock, called the "Yo-Yo effect." But as if this weren't enough, the Yo-Yo effect also weakens the immune system. 

I was the first who had the courage to say it as it is-which didn't make me friends. And yes, despite heavy resistance campaigns, even sabotage (or, as it turned out, magazines have even been threatened with 'no ads' if they would write about my work) the first edition of The BioChemical Machine, copyrighted in 1995 became a national bestseller. Why? Because honesty sells. 

Nobody can prevent the future from happening. Not even the powerful diet industry. The BioChemical A&B Eating Method ® IS the future. It is the key to enhanced quality of life; the right to be energetic; the right to be pain free even in later years of life; and the solution to eliminate health and weight problems without diets that weaken one's immune system. (And yes, the BioChemical A&B Method® will also open a new market (definitely for the next 50 years); but instead of our health going "downwards"-as it has over the past half century-it will make an upward climb in regard to health, quality of life, and energy-all vital for humankind.)

The breakthrough discovery, the clinically proven BioChemical A&B Method ® will make all the difference for millions of people. The BioChemical Machine 2 presents this latest research. It is based on state-of-the-art clinical studies and the most modern approach to health and weight problems. It is based on the premise that creating compatibility between food chemistry and body chemistry is key to sustaining a healthy weight, overcoming illness, and bolstering general overall good health. 

Central to the research is the breakthrough discovery that two different types of digestion exist for protein-one for the good proteins (pure high grade protein) that the human body has evolved to handle over the course of millions of years and another for bad proteins (abnormal proteins), which have been consumed in larger and larger quantities only since the invention of home refrigeration. 

Carbohydrates (regardless whether healthy, less healthy, or not healthy at all) have only ONE type of digestion. That's why the term "good" or "bad" carbohydrates has been taken out of context from my European edition of The BioChemical Machine (Random House).

In regard to eating carbohydrates, there is no classification for "good" or "bad" carbohydrates. It is a well known fact that some carbohydrates are healthier; others less healthy-but that's it. Carbohydrates can never cause serious or hazardous health problems. However when bad proteins are eaten chemically incorrect they create toxins in the body that leads to conditions such as acid reflux, arthritis, heart disease, diabetes, thyroid problems, kidney and liver diseases, and myriad of other illnesses that may cause distress and chronic pain. Once people know how to handle the vast difference between good and bad proteins EVERY carbohydrate will become easy to digest and valuable for the body- and as a result, will not cause any weight problems.

The BioChemical A&B formula for life is very straight forward: Eat any carbohydrate with good proteins, but never with bad proteins. This simple but significant formula will make the difference for millions of people and will end the health and weight-related problems in this country."

The BioChemical A&B Eating Method® is the clinically proven perfect match of food chemistry and body chemistry. It is the result of many years of research with internationally renowned biochemists and food chemists. The BioChemical A&B Charts®, arranged into three unique categories-"A", "Neutral" (can be eaten 24/7), and "B" divide foods according to the type of digestive process necessary for breaking down good proteins, bad proteins, carbohydrates, and fats. 

The BioChemical A&B Method® is the "guide" to help people's "old" body chemistry (developed over the course of millions of years) to handle the labyrinth of today's delicious and seductive "modern" foods. People can eat everything and anything, including bad proteins, which is the cause of many health problems. Yet, the BioChemical A&B Method ® also teaches people how to eat unhealthy foods so they don't harm the BioChemical Machine. People can happily drink their beer and enjoy every food that is out there. It's just a matter of learning how to handle the two different types of digestion that exist for protein.

Although it would have been easy for me to write "just" another simple diet book with the usual rules and regulations of calorie counting, glycemic indexes and all the other counting programs that, seemingly, people love to do: But, it's not about food-it's about our cells. If we understand this, we know don't need eating plans, diets, non-diets, anti-diets, food-combiners, glycemic indexes, low-carb, low-fat, high-protein or whatever the never-ending ideas of money-hungry people will produce.
Dieting is the root of all evil, because dieting opens one of the most vicious cycles in somebody's life: the Yo-Yo effect… the starvation shock.

The following example can make this concept more understandable by visualization as it shows the importance of ending an ineffective half-century of the "diet guru" era: If you were to drop off an overweight and/or obese person in the desert for a couple of weeks without food (or to be fair, only with small portions of food, or other "chosen" foods), the result will always be the same-a thin and emaciated-starving person! This person will, assuredly, regain everything back faster once returning to his or her normal eating habits. In actuality, dieting is voluntary starving because the body-The BioChemical Machine-will do everything in its power to prevent you from another starvation-shock. We call this natural biological reaction: The "Yo-Yo Effect."

Everybody can lose weight and become a big loser-but loser is another key word; as the bottom line is that one "loses" more than just weight. This weight loss is always a temporary condition! In addition this "loss" may weaken the immune system and the person may "lose" something more vital-their ability to fight disease. Therefore the word "loser" becomes a negative condition in most cases. In effect, unwholesome weight loss can cause a person to "lose" the ability to secure good health. No human being should stress to control their cravings to eat normally…no one should be deprived. 

Therefore, I started a crusade for the people and remained true to myself. I knew I'd meet opposition, and have, but I also knew that I had to follow my convictions and the truth-not just the useless initiative diets that produce quick results; compromise immune systems; eventual weight gain and produce boredom by following a regimen of limited foods. 

But-alas, to move a whole nation-good-will is not enough. It needs a realistic solution; a solution that is welcomed by all ages. People want real solutions that fit the reality of today's supermarkets and fast food restaurants-solutions for the entire family and something that will be fun for everybody. For the adults: who like to drink beer without the "guilt-trip" that this consumption is unhealthy or fattening. For the children: who want their chocolate and Big Macs. For the men and women: who know, all too well, the stress of struggling to lose weight. And…for the elderly and/or ill people who still need to enjoy life to the fullest.

In conclusion: Based in solid science, the Biochemical A&B Eating Method® is poised to become the health and nutrition story of the century; empowering millions to take control over their own well-being; eliminating the "Yo Yo Effect"; teaching the youth of our nation some clear-cut rules and eradicating the current plague of obesity in our youngsters. Sadly, recent studies show that today's youth and their obesity rate will deduct up to twenty years off the average life span and put our nation's health and longevity in reverse. This method can also encourage schools to implement the proper scientific eating method into their cafeteria meals and also be part of the school's health curriculum on a national level. It will not only make history, but it may change it.

The BioChemical A&B Method® is affordable for everybody. Every food industry can profit from it. Even the pharmaceutical industry is not excluded, because the A&B method enhances the effectiveness of necessary medicines.

One of the best testimonials comes from Professor Claus Leitzmann, one of a growing number of respected authorities who endorsed my research. Professor Leitzman is an internationally renowned micro-biologist, U.C.L.A molecular biologist, biochemist and author of 500 studies, articles and books in the field of Nutritional Science-he is also a recipient of the Zabel Price for Cancer Prevention and the Broerman Prize for Preventative Nutrition and this is what he has to say: "In these times with health care in a state of crisis and people searching desperately for solutions that really work and can be implemented in everybody's life…people need to know about eating the Biochemical A&B way…It's a breakthrough that could lead to a whole new quality of life and save millions of dollars for both people and governments." 

Design of Nine: A No Nonsense Plan for Creating and Maintaining Beautiful Skin At Any Age

Guest blog by Julia Tanum Hunter, M.D.
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog

1. Prevention at any age. Its never too late - just get started! 
As long as your heart is beating, no matter where you’re starting, it’s never too late. You CAN be successful - quickly, permanently and happily. You can sometimes be “bad” but because you know how to and why to be “good” and understand it’s not about deprivation, you won’t get frustrated. Beginning to experience the skin, health, youthfulness, body, brainpower, energy and vitality you desire will motivate you to stay on the road to success. AND, what’s the alternative? Aging more quickly, not feeling “good”-gastrointestinal issues, aches, pains, injuries, illnesses, operations, medications, unhappiness, diseases such as Alzheimer’s, cancer, prostate and erection issues, debilitation-physical and financial, stroke, nursing homes. Or maybe you’ll be luckier, but based on experience, prevention = greater happiness, fun and well-being and quality longevity. 

2. Avoid foods, products, ingredients and chemicals that inflame the skin and internal organs. 
-- the primary cause of disease and aging that begins afflicting us from birth! Skin, the largest organ of the body, is one of the main organs used by the body to detoxify so many of the skin issues we experience are a result of the body attempting to clear, clean and heal itself (skin is a window to what is occurring internally). As skin becomes inflamed from what we consume, absorb and are exposed to (such as pollution and sunlight) - the results are aging and disease. Research on skin cancer and aging, acne, enlarged pores, ingrown beard hairs, hyperpigmentation, photodamage, rosacea, thinning hair, heart and blood vessel disease, erectile dysfunction and organ diseases like diabetes, Alzheimer’s, cancers, arthritis and osteoporosis demonstrate that free radicals, fungal overgrowth and compromised hormone and immune systems, are the core causes resulting in inflammation, chronic and severe. Free radicals cause acidic blood and tissue pH, creating a hostile body environment of inflammation especially for collagen production (and every thing in your body is constructed of collagen). Stress causes inflammation via activating the release of stress hormones, which protect then damage, when depleted, then we progress to more disease.

3. Essential building blocks. 
The skin and body is a 24/7 construction site so we need to supply the building blocks AND ones the body needs, wants, is missing, can recognize, absorb and utilize. In today’s toxic and stress filled world and with foods as they are-even organic and right out of the garden due to soil depleted of nutrition from farming year round, it is imperative to supplement the internal organs and skin with specific foods, water and supplements-an array that keep your tissues alkaline and supplied with enough raw materials to do their job the best, the most youthfully and energetically. Your genetics and sex often require a unique prescription of what your body needs and doesn’t. You cannot take enough antioxidants in today’s world to fight the number and amount of free radicals that are being generated and inflaming your organs and tissues. Your unique Action Plan delineates everything you need for maximizing health, beauty and slowing down the ticking of the clock

4. Most everything in MODERATION regarding food. 
You are what you eat - organic, hormone and antibiotic free, grass fed, wild, the less sugar, carbs, flour (even whole wheat), grain, corn, cow's milk, the better to minimize toxicity. 

Skin Fitness Plus

• Drink 1.0-2 liters of water a day, ideally with no chlorine, fluoride or bromide, and filtered at least for organisms are recommended. Your skin and body require much water for them to function correctly. All cells need water and water helps treat and prevent constipation. Make your water therapeutic by placing one or more green tea bags in it daily.

• The closer to nature, ideally the greener and darker the fruits and vegetables the better and seasonal in your location are best. 

• Grains - white and whole wheat flour, bread, pasta, corn, white rice, oatmeal and sugars are not anyone's friend. Less is best!

• Cereals, grains, sugars and pastas should be low glycemic when eaten meaning complex grains, infrequently multi-grain and consider raw almonds, walnuts, hazelnuts, raw dates, DARK chocolate (in moderation) or unsweetened raw chocolate products, xylitol sweetened products, wild rice as better choices. Many people have gluten allergies, which cause acne, constipation and inflammatory diseases. Save your sweets for something worth aging and getting pimples for and having to exercise off or diet for and protect with antioxidants and probiotics. We all love sweets and bread, but they contribute to aging, disease and fungal overgrowth so in moderation.

• Red meat - Ideally women and men - don't consume more then once a week. Lamb is healthier then beef, pork can be healthier then both. Replace with healthy wild, low toxin fish, turkey, black beans, buffalo and wild game, chicken (skinless) and goat. Eat more vegetables and beans - also full of protein.

• ETOH in moderation (tequila, scotch, dry red wine and vodka are better choices), no sweet mixers and try not drinking every day. Alcohol increases free radicals and the body turns it into fat so take glutathione and an array of antioxidants and drink water with it. It also negatively impacts sleep, so again, indulge in moderation. Helpful solutions to cut down are (when you want a glass of wine or cocktail) to drink hot or cold tea instead, which generally distracts your brain, so you lose the urge.

• Avoid cow’s milk, even for children, as much as possible, especially if you have acne or constipation. Many are allergic to it and the lactose is a sugar that promotes fungal overgrowth and fat. It acidifies the body and you get more calcium from vegetables. Goat milk is compatible with virtually everyone and there are tasty goat cheeses, yogurts and milks. Sheep milk is next best and still better than cow’s milk.

• The right oils that juice up and plump the skin (we all dry up as we get older) and they promote health and decrease inflammation. The most anti-inflammatory oil that everyone should take is fish oil - Omega-3’s. Healthy oils for your skin and body also include olive oil (great also to put on your skin in small amounts for irritation and hydration), raw coconut oil, hemp, flax with lignans, walnut, green tea, borage, black currant.

5. Supplements and Nutrients. 
Even organic, fresh and healthy food must be supported in today’s world with vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, nutrients and targeted oils that continually replenish, strengthen, energize and detoxify the entire body, promote physical and psychological well-being and effectively combat the epidemic of acne, melasma, rosacea and skin cancers. The soil is depleted and over-farmed so supplementation is essential. Examples of these essential nutrients:

• Green powder/pills - green, green and more green, the more green the better! 
• B vitamins
• Detoxified iodine
• Multi-minerals
• Probiotics
• Digestive enzymes

6. Ingredients. 
Checking out ingredients in everything we put in and on our bodies helps to protect and enrich our diet. The hidden sugars, MSG, simple salt, the ingredients we consume in foods and their lack after shipping and cooking- of vitamins, minerals and antioxidants, even if entitled organic, greatly contribute to our inflammation. The closer to nature foods you eat, the more alkaline, healthy and rejuvenated your skin and body will become and the aging clock slows as much as possible. You CAN look 10-20 years younger than your peers. We must address the skin and body internally and externally to achieve health and turn back the clock. 

Skin Fitness Plus
7. Have your Hormone Levels Checked. 
Aging, disease, depression, sleep disorders, “brain fog”, emotional lability, lack of energy and vitality, anxiety, mid-adominal weight and struggles, nail ridging and fungus, athletes foot, jock itch, tiny postular, itchy, skin rashes, brown spots, skin tags, thickened skin growths, yeast infections, dry furrowed heels, pain and unhappiness in men and women are significantly advanced by declining hormone levels which also advances skin, collagen, tissue and hair thinning and laxity, loss of integrity and strength, weakens the immune system, negatively impacts the risks of prostate disease, and all cancers, can cause emotional and psychological changes, low energy levels and brain functioning, organ and erectile dysfunction, weight gain and let’s not forget…the law of gravity everywhere in and on the body. Acneic skin demonstrates increased hormone sensitivity at the level of the skin and must be treated and balanced to cure the problem.Bio-identical hormones in cream form vs. those in a chemical form which are foreign to the human body, properly dosed, administered, monitored and individually tailored contribute to turning back the physiological clock in a healthy manner, promoting well-being, preventing diseases, strengthening the immune system, energy, sleep, skin and brain fitness. Like nutritionals and supplements, they must be balanced and titrated both for the skin and internally. Men have the same hormones as women in different amounts. Bio-identical hormones that must be addressed include bio-identical progesterone, testosterone, DHEA, thyroid, pregnenolone, growth hormone, melatonin and more...

8. Exercise – 
Workout safely and healthfully. Exercise is anti-aging. Sweating is detoxifying, increases blood flow, oxygenation and is anti-fungal, bringing in the nutrients to the cells and tissues and increasing lymphatic flow, which takes out the toxins. Exercise helps balance hormones and increases growth hormone output, which is anti-aging, enhances good sleep, lubricates your joints and spine if done correctly, produces energy and brainpower. By increased circulation and delivery of nutrients to skin cells, you are expelling potentially damaging toxins. If you are not exercising, then you are not detoxifying nor stemming aging. Exercise is walking the stairs instead of the elevator, carrying your own groceries, taking a walk on your street or up a hill, parking the car NOT closest to the door so you have to walk a bit, bicycling, cleaning the house, doing yard work, etc. Working out with some weights doesn’t mean you always have to go to the gym, everyday chores can maintain and promote muscle mass. Your skin is attached to your muscles so lifting and toning your muscles can help to tighten skin. Building muscle also increases your metabolic rate so you burn more calories all the time and lose weight more easily. Remember - muscle weighs more than fat so you can be losing inches and the scale reports your weight is the same. Yoga is great exercise and as with all exercise, be careful and work up slowly, stretch gradually and if your body is telling you it hurts then you need to work up more slowly and often you need professional advice at first for safety. 

9. Routinely maintain skin health! 
Just as you consistently repair and upkeep your house and car, maintenance is needed for your skin and body. Everything that results in skin health and beauty must be addressed – foods, water, exercise, vitamins and supplements, bio-identical hormones and internal organ health. Insure that your physiology is kept working at its best, disease-free and youngest to achieve the results you want and the health you need! To enhance, not harm your skin, use chemically correct, therapeutic concentration products without toxic ingredients. Add scientifically correct procedures to cure damage and slow the aging process. Skin, oral, hair and nail products must be free of harmful chemicals, artificial colors, dyes, and fragrances that cause inflammation…the primary cause of disease, aging and skin pathology. Skin Regimen Must Be Individually Formulated For Women - easily and quickly doable - specifically designed for you and your unique anatomy to maximize, repair, rejuvenate, prevent and re-invigorate. 

Skin Fitness Plus . . . young at any age

Unmarried Couples Should Consider Living-Together Documents

Guest blog by Stephanie Ackler
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog

Many unmarried couples living together should have several written legal documents to serve as a proxy in place of a marriage contract and to help minimize potential financial disputes or complications in the event of a breakup or death, say financial professionals.

Unmarried couples face many of the same financial issues as married couples but without benefit of marital laws: property rights, inheritances, employee benefits, and division of income and debts, for example. Unmarried couples should consider signing these legal documents when one or both bring substantial assets or debts to the relationship, they plan to stay together a long time, children are involved, or they plan to buy a home or move into one of their homes. 

The first key document is a non-marital agreement, commonly called a "living together" or "domestic partner" agreement. This agreement is similar to a prenuptial agreement that a couple with accumulated assets might sign before they marry.

The agreement can be as specific or as broad as you wish to make it. Typically, the agreement will spell out how assets and income will be divvied up during a relationship, or after a relationship should it end. For example, it might spell out what portion each will contribute to the monthly bills. Will paychecks be pooled or kept separate? Will assets each person brings to the relationship be pooled or kept separate? What about assets inherited by one person during the relationship? Will they share employee benefits if the employer allows it? Will ownership of property bought during the relationship be based on who actually buys the property, kept proportional to the income each party earns, or split down the middle? How will existing or future debts be handled (it's often best to avoid jointly titled credit cards)? How will property be divided at separation or death?

A living-together agreement is especially important when the purchase of a major asset is involved, such as a home. How will ownership be titled? Who pays what portion of the down payment and monthly mortgage, and how will any gains from the sale of the house be split up? 

The agreement also might spell out a method for resolving future financial disagreements, such as using third-party mediation before resorting to the courts. Some agreements even go so far as to delineate who will cook and wash dishes and take out the trash, though some legal experts recommend that a separate agreement might be drafted for non financial issues. 

While there is little in the way of state statutes, most courts recognize living-together agreements-even oral agreements in some cases. But interpretations vary, so you'll want to hire an attorney (perhaps one for each party) to draft the agreement based on your specific needs and local court rulings. 

A living-together agreement is only a start, however. Unmarried couples also should have a will, living will, and powers of attorney-legal documents even married couples should have. A power of attorney allows the partner to step in financially should the other become incapacitated. You can rescind such a power as long as you're mentally competent, so don't feel stuck with it. 

A living will spells out what life-sustaining medical treatment you wish or don't wish should you become incapacitated, and the medical power of attorney grants your partner or other appointed agent such as a relative the legal authority to make medical decisions on your behalf, usually based on what you spell out in your living will. While married couples should have such documents, they are especially important to unmarried couples because relatives would otherwise likely supercede such decisions.

The same goes for a will. While married couples should have wills, state statute will typically-though not always-distribute property to the surviving spouse where there is no will. For an unmarried couple without a will, however, it's unlikely property or custody of a child will go to the surviving partner. 

All these agreements may sound unromantic, but many relationships, unmarried ones as well as married ones, can end in bitter feuds. Written agreements not only can minimize such feuds, they can actually promote a healthier relationship by focusing attention on financial issues central to all relationships.

(Please consult with your own tax and legal advisors before taking any action that would have tax consequences.)

War of the Sexes More Like War of the Wages!

Guest blog by
Source: Soroptimist International of Chicago
Submitted by: Marion E. Gold. President of Marion Gold & Co.
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog!

When American Suffragist Susan B. Anthony said, "Men, their rights and nothing more; women, their rights and nothing less."  She was right.  Unfortunately, 37 years after President John F. Kennedy signed the Equal Pay Act, woman still is paid less than man. Sorry Susan—looks like we have not "come a long, long way!" President Kennedy signed the Equal Pay Act in 1963, hoping it would end wage discrimination based on sex. At that time, women made 59 cents for every dollar earned by men. And, the wage gap has been closing—but at less than half a penny per year.  

Since 1960, and in 1998 dollars, the great divide between women's and men's earnings has only closed by $1,203. (Data from the Census Bureau March Current Population Survey.) About 60 percent of the improvement in the wage gap from 1979 to 1997 can be attributed to the decline in men's real earnings.  Approximately 40 percent of the closing of the gap is a result of women's better earning power. 

In 1998, women earned only 73 percent of the wages earned by men. Not much different than in 1996—except that the problem grows larger as more women and people of color enter the job market. By the year 2006, it is estimated that women and people of color will account for two-thirds of all new entrants into the workforce. Nearly 69 million women had jobs in 1998, making up 47 percent of workers 15 years and older.

Women of color experience the most severe pay inequities. Hispanic women earned only 53 cents, African-American women earned only 63 cents, and white women 73 cents for each dollar earned by a white man who faces no sex or race-based wage discrimination. Men of color also experience significant wage inequities. Hispanic men earned only 62 percent, and African-American men earned only 75 percent of the wages of white men. 

Contrary to data from the Employment Policy Foundation, The National Academy of Sciences reports that between one-third and one-half of the wage difference between men and women cannot be explained by differences in experience, education, or other legitimate qualifications. In fact, the Bureau of Labor Statistics reports that for 1998, women earned more than men in only two of nearly 100 detailed occupational categories: food preparation and legal assistants. In all other categories, women still lag behind the guys. For example, women dry cleaning machine operators made 10 percent less than men operators; women accountants made 25 percent less, women in administrative support made 19 percent less, and women educators and reporters made 24 percent less.

Women in unions do a bit better, earning $166 more per week on the average than those women who were not union members. Union women also earned weekly wages that were slightly more than men who were not union members.

But don’t let those figures fool you. According to the Institute for Women’s Policy Research, although working mothers who are union members earn $1.25 an hour more than nonunion working mothers—the same women gain only about 30 cents per hour for five additional years of work experience, compared to their white men counterparts who gain $1.20 for the same number of years work experience. 

Even women who have reached the highest levels of corporate America are not immune to wage discrimination. In November 1999, a Catalyst survey of Fortune 500 top earners showed that women take home 68 cents for every dollar earned by a man.

The lifetime cost to women can be devastating. According to the Institute for Women's Policy Research, a 25 year-old woman who works full-time year-round for the next 40 years will earn $523,000 less than the average 25 year-old man will, if the current wage patterns continue. Worse, the gap widens as women mature. Among workers 16-24, the wage gap is only 91 percent; yet by age 55-64, women are earning only 68 percent of men's earnings. Lower lifetime earnings translate into lower pensions and income for women in their senior years and contributes to a higher poverty rate for elderly women.            

Are women’s choices to blame? 

While some may argue that the wage gap is a result of women's choices — mainly women taking time out of the workforce to have children —  there is much more to the story than "choice." There is no doubt that time, education and experience play a role in pay rates—but only when you compare men to men! When women enter the picture — it changes drastically. 

Here are just a few of the facts from the National Committee on Pay Equity:  

- A survey of public relations professionals shows that women with less than 5 years of experience make $29,726 while men with the same amount of experience make $48,162. For PR professionals in the 5-10 year category, women earn $41,141 while men earn $47,888. In the 10-15 year category, women earn $44,941 and men earn $54,457. In the 15-20 year range, women earn $49,270 and men earn $69,120.

- Women in the field of purchasing with 3 or fewer year’s experience earn $35,900 and men earn $47,700. For purchasers with 4-6 years experience, men earn $52,100 while women earn $38,300. Women purchasers who have 7 -10 years of experience earn $42,300 while their men counterparts earn $56,400. For those with 11- 15 years experience, women earn $43,500 and men earn $63,400.

- Among video programmers, women with advanced degrees earn 64.6 percent of the earnings of their men counterparts, and women with college degrees earn 80 percent on the dollar earned by men.

Wage discrimination is much more than a so-called "women’s issue."  

In today’s society, with the earnings of "wives" and "mothers" so essential to family support, pay equity is a "bread and butter" issue, according to a national study reported by the AFL-CIO and the Institute for Women’s Policy Research. In analyzing data from the Census Bureau and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, they jointly reported that "working families" pay a steep price for unequal pay.

Almost two thirds of the 50,000-working women who responded to the 1997 AFL-CIO survey said they provide one half or more of their families’ incomes. More than 25 percent report they are heads of households with dependent children. 

Still need convincing that pay equity is critical to this country’s economic health?  

It is estimated that America’s working families lose $200 billion of income annually to the wage gap—an average loss of more than $4,000 for each working family every year. Although some states fare better than others, a reduced wage gap does not necessarily coordinate with improved economic status for women and their families. For example, women earn the most in comparison to men in our Nation’s capitol—Washington, DC. But the primary reason is that the wages of minority men is so low.

This is bleak news when considering that working women represent the bridge out of poverty for many married couples and working families. A 1997 labor department analysis found that 7.7 percent fewer white families, 11.4 percent few African-American families, and between 9 percent and 25 percent fewer Hispanic families are poor because both husbands and wives are working. 

- If married women were paid the same as comparable men, their family incomes would rise by nearly six percent, and their families’ poverty rates would fall from 2.1 percent to 12.6 percent.

- If single women earned as much as comparable men, their incomes would rise by 13.4 percent, and their poverty rates would be reduced from 6.3 percent to one percent. 

Bottom line is that if single working mothers achieved pay equity, their poverty rates would be cut in half, according to the AFL-CIO Sorry fellas. This is not a women’s issue—it is a national issue.

Simply put, pay discrimination based on gender hurts all of us—as individuals, as families, and as a nation. Because of pay discrimination, literally hundreds of thousands of households will have less groceries, make fewer doctors visits, and have less money to put aside for retirement. Does pay equity mean setting up a national wage-setting system? Of course not! But it does mean that wages must be based on job requirements like skill and responsibility— not skin color, religious beliefs, age or gender.  Will pay equity solve every problem? Of course not! But when the day comes that wages are truly equitable, people—individuals and their families—will grow healthier, stronger and more confident. And so will our businesses and our economy! 

The facts and figures presented in this article were provided by Soroptimist International of the Americas and compiled by the National Committee on Pay Equity from the following sources: The U.S. Department of Commerce, Census Bureau;  The U. S. Department of Labor; the U. S. Department of Labor, Bureau of Labor Statistics; and the Institute for Women's Policy Research. 

Marion Gold is the author of two books on women in the workforce and writes frequently on women’s advocacy issues. She was recently named the Year 2000 Communicator of Achievement by the Illinois Woman's Press Association.

Older Women MUST Prepare Better For Retirement Years

Guest blog by Stephanie Ackler
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog

Men and women hoping to retire within the next five to ten years are being forced to face a cold truth-they may not be financially prepared to retire. And women are especially vulnerable. Consider these facts about older women from the Administration on Aging:

· In 2001, women accounted for nearly 60 percent of the population age 60 and older, and 70 percent of the population 85 and older.
· Seven out of ten baby-boom women will outlive their husbands.
· Older women are twice as likely as older men to live in poverty, and half of the elderly widows living in poverty were not living in poverty before their husbands died.
· Older women are three times as likely as older men to live alone.
· Most older women depend primarily on Social Security for their retirement income, and are half as likely to receive employer pension benefits as men.
· According to the Census Bureau, retirement income for women over age 65 is just over half of the retirement income received by men in the same age group.

The reasons older women find themselves in this financially precarious position are many, ranging from working fewer years in lower-paying jobs than men, to saving less for retirement. But the question now is, how can older women approaching retirement make up for lost time?

Make retirement a priority. It's common for women to make financial sacrifices during their working years, such as staying at home to raise children or care for elderly relatives. And many tend to rely on their husbands for their principal financial support. But the problem is, women outlive men by an average of five years, and thus have more years in retirement to fund. Their husband's income from Social Security and employer pensions will drop significantly if the husband dies first, which is why widows commonly fall into poverty unless they have some of their own retirement resources. 

Beef up savings. A woman in her fifties or sixties can't make up for decades of lost retirement income and tax-deferred compounding, but she can at least make up some of the shortfall by beefing up savings. First, establish one or more retirement accounts if you don't already have one, such as joining a retirement plan at work or opening an individual retirement account (IRA). Even a nonworking spouse can put up to $3,000 a year into an IRA, and an additional $500 if she is age 50 or older. 

Next, pay your retirement accounts just as you would any critical monthly bill-before it is frittered away in discretionary spending. Direct deposits make it easier and less painful.

Contribute the most you can afford to contribute and that rules allow-at least enough to earn the entire match an employer might make into a 401(k) plan if that's available, and ideally up to the maximum allowed by the plan. For many types of retirement plans and IRAs, workers over age 50 can kick in an extra "catch up" contribution above what younger workers are allowed.

Beef up Social Security benefits. Returning to work can beef up a woman's Social Security benefits ultimately earned in her name. Social Security bases its payments on a 35-year employment history, and even part-time work may earn more in a year than what she might have been making three decades ago.

Know your retirement rights. For example, women are guaranteed to continue to receive a portion of their husband's company pension if their husband dies before they do-unless they sign away that right. Women sometimes do that out of ignorance or because the couple decides to take the "single lifetime" payout because it provides a higher income stream than the "joint and survivor" payout. But those single-lifetime payouts stop when the beneficiary dies, and women are more likely to outlive their husbands.

Older women also should educate themselves about what Social Security benefits they might receive because they are married-and what benefits they might still receive in the event of divorce.

Long-term care insurance. While many men and women should investigate long-term care insurance, it can be especially important for women. Women are twice as likely as men to live in a nursing home, and they're less likely to be able to stay at home because they will have outlived their husbands who might care for them.

(Please consult with your own tax and legal advisors before taking any action that would have tax consequences.)

Don't Overlook These Lessor-Known Features for Long Term Care Insurance Policies

When buying a long-term care insurance policy, most consumers concentrate on the basic features of the policy such as the dollar amount of the daily benefits, the length of coverage and what circumstances trigger the policy's benefits. But newer LTC policies offer features and options consumers frequently overlook, that can be very beneficial to the insured. 

Survivorship benefits. This is an attractive feature for couples who buy individual policies from the same insurer. When one spouse dies, the company waives the remaining premiums on the surviving spouse's policy. For this to go into effect, the insurer generally requires that both policies have been in force for several years (typically seven to ten years), and some policies require that no benefits have been paid to either spouse during that period. 

Shared benefits. Couples who buy policies with benefits for a limited number of years, such as two or five, versus lifetime benefits, might find this feature attractive. This comes in three forms. One type allows people who exhaust their benefits to dip into their partner's policy benefits. Another version creates a third pool of benefits that either partner can dip into. A third form is to have a single pool of benefits that both partners draw on.

The obvious risk here is that with two of the types, you could drain the other partner's benefits. Financial planners commonly recommend that consumers buy lifetime benefits if they can afford it.

Alternate plan of care. One reason consumers are reluctant to buy an LTC policy when they are younger (say in their 50s) is the concern that the policy will become obsolete and not cover newer forms of care. For example, adult day care centers and assisted living facilities weren't around years ago, and older policies still in force won't cover them. With the alternate plan-of-care feature, the insured, his or her doctor, and the insurance company will ideally agree on a plan of care not currently specified under the policy but which the company will pay for.

Accelerated payments. This allows you to pay up the policy within a certain period instead of over the rest of your life by making accelerated premium payments. Examples include ten-year pay or payments made until you turn 65. Accelerated premiums, which are not allowed in some states, might run two to three times more than lifetime premiums.

This feature eliminates the challenge of making payments when you're living on limited retirement income, and it can provide a tax advantage for some business owners (especially C corporation owners). On the other hand, should you need the policy earlier in your lifetime than is normal, you've "overpaid" your premiums. Disciplined savers also could bank the extra premium money they otherwise would have made, letting it earn interest and drawing on it for premiums once you're retired.

Enhanced elimination period. LTC policies offer a choice of elimination periods, which is the number of days you must pay for long-term care out of your pocket before the policy starts paying. The elimination period may range from zero days up to 180 days or even a year. The longer the elimination period, the smaller the premium. 

With an enhanced elimination period, you can start or accelerate the elimination period "clock" with just a few home health care visits. This can save you out-of-pocket expenses during the elimination period.

Respite care. It's common for family members or friends to provide informal care at home to someone who otherwise would have qualified for their policy benefits. When this occurs, some policies will pay for temporary care while the family caregiver takes a "break," even though the insured has not met the elimination period. Policies typically limit the number of respite days you can take.

These are just of a few of the lesser-known long-term care features. Others include bed reservation benefits, non-forfeiture benefits, geriatric care management coverage, international care, return of premium upon death, restoration of benefits and caregiver training. Some are standard in most policies, others are offered as options at additional cost. Review these and similar features with your financial planner and long-term care insurance agent to see if they're available and if they make sense for you.

(Please consult with your own tax and legal advisors before taking any action that would have tax consequences.)

Roasted Squash Soup

Guest recipe by Alexandra Guarnaschelli,
Exec. Chef: Butter Restaurant
Watch her interview on The Woman's Connection YouTube Vlog

Serves 4-6

4 pounds mixed Winter squash (from Hubbard to Butternut varieties), washed
4 tbsp. unsalted butter
2 tbsp. dark brown sugar
3 tbsp. Molasses
Kosher salt to taste
Freshly ground white pepper to taste
1 tsp. ground ginger
1 knob fresh ginger, peeled and finely grated
1 tsp. ground cinnamon
ź tsp. ground cloves
2 cups water
2 cups heavy cream
3 cups skim milk
The zest from 1 orange
2 tbsp. Worcestershire Sauce
1 tbsp, garlic oil
Equipment: Blender or food processor

1. Preheat oven to 375 F.
2. Place the squash on a flat surface and split them in half lengthwise. Scrape out the seeds and arrange in a single layer on 1 or 2 baking sheets.
3. In a small saucepan, melt the butter completely over medium heat. Wait until it starts to turn a light brown color. Remove from the heat and immediately distribute the butter into the cavities of the squash halves. Sprinkle with the brown sugar and Molasses as well.
4. Season the insides with salt and pepper. Finish by covering with the ground (dry) ginger, fresh ginger and the ground cloves. Fill the bottom of the tray(s) with the water (should be about 1 inch high) to create steam while the squash bakes in the oven. Cover the tray(s) with aluminum foil and seal the edges tightly.
5. Place the tray(s) in the center of the oven and bake, undisturbed, for 2 hours. To check for doneness, pierce one of the halves with the tip of a small knife. The knife should slide in and out easily. If at all firm, bake the halves and addition 30-45 minutes. Remove from the oven. Carefully peel back the foil. Set aside to cool.
6. In a medium pot, combine the cream and milk. Season with salt and pepper. Bring to a simmer. Using a large spoon, scoop the flesh from the squash taking care not to take any skin with it. The skin can give a bitter taste to the soup. Add the flesh directly to the cream mixture and stir to blend. Turn the heat on low. Add some of the orange zest, the Worcestershire Sauce and the garlic oil. Stir to blend. Taste for seasoning. If the soup lacks sweetness, add a little Molasses. If it lacks salt, add a little salt or Worcestershire Sauce.
7. Serve immediately. Enjoy!